H E L P acronym wanted

Felix Atagong

Active Member
Joined
Jun 27, 2003
Messages
359
The last 2 weeks our IT department (well, that's me in fact) has had these intelligent problems from the people at work...

CLASSIC HARDWARE PROBLEMS
the printer is broken ---> no toner (a common problem)

SOFTWARE PROBLEMS

Word
how can I make a header?
how does it come that my text slides to the right (and even to the bottom) when I insert some new text? (this person, who uses Word for over 15 years, wanted to make a 3 column page not by inserting columns, or a table, or by using tabs, but by counting and inserting spaces inbetween words)
I can't find my document any more (it was in fact a pdf file, not a Word one)

Excel
I have lost all my prices! (person had hidden several columns but didn't know how to unhide)
I can't see my statistics anymore (person had disabled the 'show all objects', I didn't even know there was this option, so I actually learned something there)
I can't find my document any more (same person, looking for the same pdf file but now from inside Excel)

Most problems can be resolved by looking into the help file, I try to explain before coming over, but as the word help isn't apparently a part of their active vocabulary I have to get over to their desk anyway, press the 'right' button and leave again...

So I'm looking for an acronym for the word HELP that maybe will enlighten their spirits and will make them press that silly help button instead of calling me (it's a pity they all learned how to use a telephone, although I don't understand how on earth they managed to do that)...

(the making of this post was interrupted by a colleague who wanted me to explain how to visualise a YouTube movie. Busy. Busy. Busy.)
 

Excel Facts

Excel Wisdom
Using a mouse in Excel is the work equivalent of wearing a lanyard when you first get to college
Code:
        Press help
        Read the documents and
        Everyone
        Should
        Stop

        Having
       "Emergency"
    ExceL
        Problems

Or, just the usual RTFM ;)
 
Hold
Everything! -
Luddite
Panicing!

Which probably won't mean much to non-native english speakers.

Richard
 
Henceforth
Everyone should
Look for himself instead of
Phoning me
 

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